Heat and Numbness
by Alex Accursed
Summary: Draco's got some secrets that he doesn't want anyone to know. So, when Harry Potter finds out and offers help, of course Draco's mad. But Harry won't stop trying to help out. This could only end in disaster.
1. Numbness

Okay, so I never once thought I would be writing one of these. I guess after reading enough you want to write your own. I think this will only have two parts to it. So, this is chapter one. I hope you like how Draco and Harry are. I know that they probably aren't anywhere close to the ones in the books, but I honestly did try. Ugh, this probably sucks on ice because I don't cut. I've been cut by things, but I've never cut myself. Not in this way anyways.

By the way, **I don't own Harry Potter or anything that really has to do with it. I'm just a fan trying to have a little fun by borrowing the characters. ^^**

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The Astronomy Tower seemed like an unlikely place to find Draco on that winter night, yet there he was, watching the sky. He wasn't waiting for anyone or anything to happen. He just wanted to feel numb and knew the cold cause it. He didn't plan to kill himself, but felt the need to feel numb to the world.

"Heh, now I know why you're so cold during the day." Draco slowly turned and looked at Potter. He raised an eyebrow a little. What did Potter mean?_ Oh, right, we're enemies. Get your head together, Draco._

"Your lips are blue!" Potter sounded alarmed. Draco shrugged, he hadn't noticed that he was that cold. He had lost all feeling hours ago. "We have to take you to the Hospital Wing!" Potter seemed scared for Draco. He grabbed Draco's wrist and started pulling, saying that they could use the invisibility cloak to get there. Draco shook his head and pulled away from Potter.

"I don't want to. Don't you get it, Potter!? I _like _being this cold." Draco snarled at the black-haired person trying to help out, just a little. Potter glared at Draco and then realized that they were still enemies. He walked out, shaking his head. Draco put his fingers on his lips. _Why would Potter notice that his lips were blue? Of all things?_

Draco wondered his way back into the dungeon. He snuggled into his blankets. The silk sheets felt so warm against his flesh. The sleep he fell into didn't feel like it last long at all. He figured that he only got about four hours of sleep. _I wonder how long Potter got to sleep... _The thought seemed so weird to the young Malfoy, but he was still very cold and used that as his reasoning. Potter had seen him freezing and he was wondering about him. It seemed normal. He sighed and walked into the Common Room. The fire was already blazing, even though it appeared that he was the only who was awake. He didn't bother sitting close to the fire. He enjoyed the cold that had fallen around him. He wished the fire would go out and let the others feel the cold that he so enjoyed. _Or maybe I like the numbness... _

_"_Oh, Draco, you're awake!" Pansy said when she walked out of the girls' chamber. "Hold on!" She ran into the girls' room and came out a moment later with a pack of hot chocolate mix with a note on top. She handed it to Draco. "Someone gave it too me last night. I didn't get a look at them."

_If you ever feel like warming up, you know where I'll be._

_HP~_

Draco started at it. He knew exactly who it was and where they'd be anytime they could see each other. In the Griffindor Common Room. Heat flooded Draco's body, but he somewhat liked it. He looked at Pansy and the cold flooded back into him, numbing every inch. He felt like he didn't really know her. Maybe he didn't. Maybe they never really were friends.

"I'm going to get some breakfast." He said quickly stuffing the note and hot chocolate into his pocket. He headed to the Great Hall, thinking about Harry and how warm his hand had been on Draco's wrist. He found his way into the Hall, no trouble. The next part too a little more effort. He slowly walked to the Griffindor table. He placed the hot chocolate in front of Potter. He smirked at him a little.

"That's some sick joke." Draco said and walked to his own table, the place he belonged, the Slytherin table. The other Slytherins were talking to him and the numb feeling came over him again. He loved it so much, but wanted to feel the warmth that Potter had brought by grabbing his wrist. Draco excused himself, heading down to his room, grabbed something out of his bag, and went to the nearest bathroom. It wasn't something new for Draco to go off by himself, he had started doing it more and more that year and the one before.

Draco bit his lip and made a small cut on his wrist, the one Potter had grabbed. The warm blood slowly slipped out of the cut and down his wrist. The warmth felt so like the hand that had grabbed his wrist. He made a slightly deeper and longer cut. He winced a little, but the pain reminded him that he was alive. The blood fell quicker. _The poor sink..._ Draco grabbed a towel and wiped up the blood in the sink. He pulled some gauze out of his pocket and smiled at himself for keeping it on him. He wrapped up the cuts, making sure the gauze was wrapped tightly around his wrist. He pulled his sleeve over the gauze and relaxed. He felt like he was on top of the world, but figured that one false move could make him fall again. Draco slipped into the Slytherin Common Room feeling very giddy and loads better than when he had felt so numb. Happily, he talked to everyone, trying hard not to let anything of his recent actions slip. He laughed at some of the lamest jokes he had ever heard and said a lot of things about his home life. Everyone and everything seemed to interesting and fun like he was at a party.

Slowly, though, everything seemed to slip into a cool numbness. He excused himself from the world that had seemed like a party and walked to the Griffindor Tower. The fat lady looked at him suspiciously. "I need to see Potter." He demanded, and just then Potter walked out. He was smirking. He motioned for Draco to follow him. They went to the Astronomy Tower.

"I knew you would come find me." Harry said and leaned up against a wall. Draco glared at him. "You need something to drag you out of your numbness and into reality, but for you to do alone is hard." Draco nodded. Harry was right. Harry was always right. "So, you've gone to cutting and when two little cuts didn't work, you came to me." He sounded a lot like that friend of his. Draco glared a little at him. "I guess I can help y-" He never got to finish because Draco ran out of the room. _How DARE Potter act like I'm something weak, something below him, something ONLY he can help. I don't NEED help!_

Draco pulled his knife out of his pocket. He unwrapped the gauze, causing the cuts to open again. It felt nice and he almost went back to the Common Room then except Potter's face came up in his memory. The numbness came harder than ever before. He dug the knife into his pale flesh and made a deep cut that quickly, oh so very quickly, became a deep red. He shuddered a little from the pain. It felt so amazing this time like he had opened doors that he shouldn't have. The forbidden, the unneeded, and the freedom that came with opening such doors was amazing. The pain was nothing compared to the feelings that suddenly filled him.

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I believe I may have made Draco Malfoy a little Bi polar and Harry's just...a jerk.


	2. Heat

Chapter two! Will things get better for our little Draco? Or will he only get worse as Harry tries his hardest to help the blond? I can't tell you. That would ruin this chapter! This one is so fluffy! This MIGHT be the end... not really thinking about adding more to it. Draco gets more relaxed by the end of the chapter. C= So cute.

**I don't own Harry Potter. J.K. Rowling does. ^^ I like her writing better anyways.**

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A few month passed without Draco going back to the knife or Potter. The numbness he felt was good enough, but as the weather heated up it was harder to become numb at night. He gave up trying after a while and gave complete control to the cuts he could make. That's how walked into lunch one day, scars done in amazing patterns, but completely covered. Pansy was clinging to his arm. He didn't seem to mind. He even seemed to welcome the clinging.

See, lately Draco was getting onto cloud nine in more than one way. Sure, cutting was his main way, but when it wasn't enough, he used other people. Pansy was easily his main toy to keep him on cloud nine.

Out of the corner of his eye, he caught Potter staring, and pull Pansy into a kiss. She wanted to pull him out of the room, so they could do more in private. He pushed her away when he realized that Potter had seen all he wanted to. Draco sat out to eat. He flirted shamelessly with everyone he could. If he had bothered watching Potter, he would've seen the pity that was on his face. But with Draco Malfoy, it didn't matter. Didn't matter if the knife was clean or had blood from the last cut. Didn't matter if the person he was with was a guy or girl. So long as they were good. He had stopped caring about nearly everything all together. Half the time, he didn't show up to class.

When he should have been at his potions class, he was off with some guy. No names were needed and it didn't matter what house he was from. The only thing Draco knew was that he wasn't from Gryffindor. Draco was in control of the situation. He guessed that the guy might be a Hufflepuff. The guy's brown hair was ruffled even before he let Draco use him like this. Draco slowly pushed him away and started walking away, fixing his clothes.

"What? Didn't you enjoy it?" The other snapped. Draco looked over his shoulder at the guy. He chuckled.

"Sure I did, but honestly you're boring." Draco's voice was lacking all emotions. He felt completely warm, and was tried of seeing the guy. His eyes were full of tears and it annoyed the Malfoy to no end. One of the Slytherin's in his potions class handed him some notes they took during the class. Draco rolled his eyes a little at the person's handwriting, but couldn't bring himself to complain about such a thing. Pansy clung to his arm again, pretending they were dating. Draco just wanted away from everyone. He dragged Pansy to his room and all but threw her onto his bed. He nearly ripped her clothes off her, but gently pulled off his own clothing. This was how he enjoyed it more. That guy wouldn't let him get anywhere near where he wanted to be. Pansy, though, was easy. Just let her know the intent and she's getting undressed before you count to five.

Draco skipped dinner. He could never drag himself to the table for dinner. No one worried. They all thought that he could take care of himself. Everyone did except the Potter who knew that Draco wasn't exactly sane. That night, Draco found him in The Shrieking Shack. He didn't really know why he was there, but it was away from everyone. He pulled off the jacket he was wearing because the nights were still a little cool. He stood where a cold breeze was coming in. _I'm tired of all this. It's all repetitive and annoying. The way Potter looks at me! Honestly you would think that he would've said something to one of the teachers, being the goody-goody two shoes that that brat is! _Draco was ripped from his thoughts by the sounds of someone coming into the room. He tensed up and nearly started yelling when he saw it was Potter himself. What stopped him from yelling was that Potter was holding two cups of hot coco. Potter handed him one of the cups, smiling. Draco held the cup, not wanting to take a sip. It could have been poisoned! Potter was drinking his, though. Draco stared at him.

"What? I came here to make sure you didn't die." Potter said, trying to sound relaxed even though the situation was tense. Draco mumbled a thanks because it was more than anyone else had done for him. Sure, Pansy opened her legs and let him use her over and over, but it wasn't the same as just sitting in silence, drinking coco, and just enjoying someone's presence. Draco even humbled himself enough to sit next to Potter. Potter rested his left hand on top of Draco's hand. When Potter squeezed Draco's hand a little, Draco felt like Potter was trying to keep him from disappearing. It made him smile a little. Someone actually wanted him around for more than his body. It was more than reason enough to try and live life.

After a few moments of silence and being done with their coco, Harry spoke up. "So, I guess I'll see you in classes from now on?" It was a request. He just wanted Draco to show up to class. It would be a little more time they could be in the same room, maybe even interact. Draco nodded and Potter put his jacket on Draco's shoulders before swiping Draco's jacket. Harry had a mischievous look on his face. "Just so you keep to your word." He decided to leave at that moment. Draco sat there, smiling like a fool, for a few more moments before actually putting on Harry's jacket and going back to his room.

Draco actually showered and tried to look nice the next day. He smiled at Harry who nodded his approval. Harry stood up and walked over to Draco. Harry grabbed Draco's hand and spun him around in a small circle, taking in every inch of Draco in that small spin. Draco's heart raced as he watched Harry. He wouldn't admit it, but he had fallen so in love.

"See you at lunch?" Harry said and got a small giggle out of the blond. It was rare for Draco to laugh, even when he was in a fantastic mood. Harry smiled and walked back to his table. People started whispering to Harry when he sat down. He kept his head held high. Draco went to his own table. He was asked things like "What was that?" and "Are you and Potter a thing?". He honestly couldn't give them a straight answer. He didn't know what that was and he didn't know if they were together. He was grinning, though. Granger and Weasley had to watch the exchange! That alone made Draco Malfoy smile. Potter's friends had to watch their friend talk to someone they hated. It wasn't even able to be passed as an argument.

Just before class, Potter found Draco and pulled him into a quick and gentle kiss. It was different from anything that Draco had ever felt. First off, it had no tongue. Another thing that made it different was that it wasn't full of lust. Harry blushed a little.

"Sorry if it wasn't any g-" Draco held up a hand and smiled. "It was amazing." He whispered. It was, too. Simple, quick, but full of every emotion that Harry was feeling. Harry let out a sigh of relief. Taking Potter's hand made Draco feel very important. Before they went to their seats, Potter gave Draco another quick kiss. Everyone seemed to gasp at the same time. Draco basically fell into his seat. Then, Granger slapped him. The sound seemed to echo around the room.

"How dare you kiss Harry! You filthy scum!" Draco smirked when she said those words. He leaned back in his seat.

"I kissed him, hum? Obviously you didn't see right. It was the other way around." _How dare that Mudblood touch me! Over what? Their "Chosen One" falling for a guy? The Boy-Who-Lived having the hots for me? Get over it, Granger. Or look the other way when I snog the crap out of him. Both work for me. _Obviously, Harry didn't expect anyone to react like that.

After class, Draco walked up to a very sad looking Potter. "Yo, Potter, I'm not going to slap you. You can look up." When he did, he was greeted by a gentle kiss from Draco himself. "Pay back." Draco explained, arms wrapped around Potter's neck. Potter smiled and wrapped his arms around Draco's waist.

"So, you're not mad at me for Hermione slapping you?" Potter asked with a look of complete innocence on his face. Draco rested his head on Potter's shoulder.

"No. I'm kind of mad at her." Draco was letting his guard down a little. He knew that he shouldn't, but it just felt so freaking right. Harry gently brushed their lips together. _See, Draco? Everything Potter does in a relationship is on the innocent scale. You can let your guard down...just for a little bit. _"Potter, we're gonna be late for class if we don't hurry." Said after several minutes of just holding each other. Slowly, arms returned to the sides of their owners. After a quick kiss, the Malfoy and Potter went their different ways.


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